A bit of Short Fiction on a Sunday afternoon

I meet with some writers twice a month, and we use writing prompts to get us started. Here is today’s effort. The prompt is in italics.

Streams of glowing gas and sparks of painfully bright matter wreathed themselves around Susan’s vessel and pierced the light-darkening film on the window, and the indicators for X-rays, gamma rays, and microwave energy shot up to the top of their scales. She imagined her eyebrows crisping and hair kinking to ash on her scalp, even though not a wavelength of radiation was getting through.
With a wink, it all disappeared just as she picked up her phone.
“Hello? Hi you!”
No big deal, just watching the birth of the Universe. The Discovery Channel runs a different version of it on every Wednesday, and I try to keep up with it. This week is the Sagan version, but it’s OK, I have this episode recorded.”
“Yes, Ari, I know that you used to say that when you were rabbi at Etz Chayim ‘You are the U in Universe.’” How’s the weather up there? It’s nice to hear from you. How’s Joy? Good. Now, how can I help you?”
“No, you called me.”
“Ok, maybe you’ll remember as we talk. It was really foggy here this morning, it was the strangest thing, it started out overcast, but no big deal, then got really foggy, then cleared up again. I was having breakfast with Sara, like we do every Sunday.
“Oh, gosh, we started going to Joni’s around the time Mike graduated high school, so wow, that’s about 25 years now, because he’s 43. Where does the time go?”
“Mike and the kids? I heard from them, let’s see a week ago Friday. They called for Leonard’s birthday. The kids look fine, considering.”
“Yes, the long skinny bones of low gravity! Ari, I used to think normal weight children were anorexic. My orbital grandchildren look like skeletons to me.”
“Well, YOUR family has tall genes. Except for my father’s height that Mike inherited, Tramiels are generally built like fireplugs, Joy and your girls towered over us, and our grandkids remind me of coatracks in Spandex. Have you remembered why you called?”
“That long? How about email?”
“Is your L-5 uplink working? When did you test it last?”
“Hm. Well, maybe there’s another reason. Did you make Ileana angry? Or Mike? Look, I have to bite my tongue every time I talk to them, trying not to get angry about where they live. I’m, sorry we are twelve thousand miles away from my, grandchildren, sorry OUR grandchildren, who can’t come to visit me without hours of extra physical training and only at the price of being miserable. If it weren’t for my no-fault calling contract, I might never speak to them again.”
“I got the idea from business contracts I negotiated for the synagogue. Radical acceptance and no-fault conditions. I did this after I almost wore out my therapists’ tissue supply wondering how I’d cope when they left. Before the two of them boosted up to orbit ten years ago, I made them sign a document setting out a minimum communication level. Mike owes me one call a week, plus birthdays and holidays, each call to go on for at least 180 seconds, no matter what we say to each other on email or during the call. I wouldn’t loan them a dime for boosting up without getting that in writing. With four girls, you have no idea how little boys need to communicate.”
“What, she’s calling now? Great! If you remember, let me know how it goes. I’m going back to my cosmology; I’ll be here all night. Give them my love.”
And with a click and a push of a button, Susan was immersed in the glowing gas that was the Universe in its first three minutes. She thought she could maybe see some globular structures coalescing in the lower right hand corner of the screen. She never tired of it, whatever the mathematical constraints; she loved the watch the Universe come into being.
“OK THERE’S a solar system,” she whispered to herself. “wonder if it’s going to be ours?”
#####

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A good day, indeed

I woke up to a sweet smelling world of golden sunshine and 81 degrees. In the middle of October. There was hardly any wind, and as I walked to have a coffee with my good friend Mona, the streets of Midtown Palo Alto were wide open and welcoming.

Then I met some friends outside the SAP Arena, and we watched the Sharks win a hockey game.

Lovely day.

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Turmeric

Its fascinating seeing where things come from.

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Turmeric

Turmeric
Turmeric is a rhizomatous herbaceous perennial plant of the ginger family, Zingiberaceae. It is native to tropical Indian Subcontinent and needs temperatures between 20 °C and 30 °C and a considerable amount of annual rainfall to thrive. Wikipedia

Thought to slow cancer growth and prevent Alzheimer’s.

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Australia

Koalas are so Cute!

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Australia

Hugging a koala

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My body, Our Bodies, Our Choice

I am unabashedly pro-choice.

To that end I am going to the fundraising luncheon for NARAL, the National Abortion Rights Action League, at a local hotel today. I have been doing this for 10 years, and will probably do it for many years in the future.

It would be great if such lunches were no longer needed.  If American women had freedom to decide whether they wanted to be mothers or not, they would not be needed.

What I don’t understand is, why aren’t there corresponding fundraising lunches to help women and families with infertility issues?  That is the other side of choice, isn’t it? 

Are there such efforts?  Please let me know.

 

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My son at the Monterey Bay Aquarium

My son  at the Monterey Bay Aquarium

Showing how tall he was the last time he stood in front of the logo of the Monterey Bay Aquarium. We drove down there for my birthday. I LOVED driving his Dodge Challenger with the 5.0 liter hemi engine and the 6-speed transmission. VROOM!

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Why all the Blog Posts Last Week?

Dear Readers,

At least one of you (and I am heartened to see that someone is watching)  has commented on the unusual volume of posts on this blog last week.  There is no foul play, just reorganization. I have been consolidating my blogs, and when a post is re-published, that is to say, moved from Blogspot to WordPress, and automatic notice goes out to all followers.  So that is how I managed to write five or six posts in one day. I  just moved  them over.

Why, you my ask, do I post on more than one blog site?  That is a whole other story.

When you think about it, anyone who has both Facebook and Twitter has more than one blog site, because that is what Facebook and Twitter are–strictly constrained and pre-digested blog sites, but that is for another day.

Blame it on Erma Bombeck. I went to a writer’s convention given in her memory in March of 2011. When I was there, among other things,  I learned  how comments and cross-posts could help my  blog rise in the ratings, so I created a second blog on WordPress to comment and cross-post to my Blogspot  blog with.

Then I started blogging for the Jewish Women’s Archive. Then I started getting bombarded with offers to join writer’s sites like She Writes and Red Room, all of whom strongly encouraged me to post my writing on their sites. So I did.  I’m a sucker for a nice request.

I even briefly toyed with the idea of starting a bunch of blogs on different platforms to embody different parts of my personality.   I have definitely had too much Jungian therapy.  They believe that each person has many personality traits, or archetypes, influencing their behavior.

These are the “inner” tendencies, like the ‘inner child,’ the ‘inner parent,’ or in my case the ‘inner Princess, and the  ‘inner farmer.”  I was going to start a blog for food, a blog for gardening, a blog for shopping, and a blog for charitable giving, and have them all talk to each other, that is talk to myself, from different machines I own.

But I didn’t do it.  I’ll say it’s my basically honest nature.  It could also be that I am just too busy dealing with the outer challenges of being president of synagogue Etz Chayim in Palo Alto to be bothered with playing games with my inner selves. They are all just going to have to get along for now.

But, dear readers, I am going to be moving posts around for at least a couple of weeks, and successful writing these days involves writing in all sorts of places, so the frequent notices will continue.

Eventually, all my blog posts  going back to January of 2008, will end up here.

Until I panic about something or respond to a nice request and start another blog somewhere else.

Keep watching.

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Rolling in Dough Part II

Part one–or rather, version one,of this article appeared on the Jewish Women’s Archive blog, “Jewesses with Attitude,”

http://jwablog.jwa.org/rolling-in-dough

My congregation had a big Purim Party on Sunday. While they needed about 300 hamantaschen,   I brought enough dough to make 150 of them, Sue brought enough dough for 400 of them, and enough filling for about 600, and Sarah M. made a huge quantity of delectable chocolate dough, which Helen Hubert made up into another 200.

Let’s hear it for the Etz Chayim Bakers!  Congregation Etz Chayim (we’re having a membership drive, btw)

So since we had about two and a half times what was needed, we were good on the quantity. This is not news, we are Jewish. No, what is news is that I just perused the web to see what my fellow Jewesses have been up to in the hamantaschen department, and I believe I have something new to contribute.

There are some awesome offerings out there. My favorite is a commercial site that has a wonderful picture of a plate of the triangular cookies arranged into the shape of Star of David. Beautiful, but looking at those cookies makes me think that maybe they are a bit dry.

And I thought that our bakers were good, but in my perusal of the web, I found out that we have been bested by the women bakers in the neighborhood of Schenechtady, NY, who in the year 2008 baked 4000–yes, that is FOUR THOUSAND hamantaschen for distribution in the community of Niskayuna, NY.

But I said I had something new to contribute, and I do: Striped, irresistible, hamentaschen.

You see, I used to make jewelry out of polymer clay. The jewelry was made out of plastic-based modeling compound that came in all sorts of colors, and was shaped and rolled like dough, then baked in the oven. You see where I’m going, here?

So I’m going to show you some pictures of my creations, and give you the recipe for my award winning deliacies, and not tell you too much on how to do the striping. That will be my secret.

My congregation, Etz Chayim, had a hamantaschen bake-off in 2003, and my cookies won. They were so good, one dad called them “heroin hamantaschen,” because they were so addictive, he could not stop eating them. I can’t blame him. They have two of the best flavors in the world in one bite—the cookie is a rich vanilla butter cookie  and the filling is chocolate brownie, a ganache actually. Alice Medrich created the recipe, which was printed in her book A Year in Chocolate.

You should know a few things: that this filling recipe makes enough for almost two batches of cookie dough, a tiny little 1 tsp cookie scoop is the fastest way to parcel out the filling, and that you should wet the edges of the cookies and pinch the sides of the hamantaschen together very carefully  to make sure they do not fall apart in the oven.   If the striping is too much,  to handle, forget  about it.  This pile of cookies went like lightning at the Purim Party, and they are mostly not striped.  Heck, Alice Medrich herself did not bother with the striping, I just go overboard sometimes.

Chocolate Hamantaschen

Filling

1 stick butter

4 ounces unsweetened chocolate, coarsely chopped

3/4 cup sugar

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1/4 teaspoon salt

2 cold eggs

2 tablespoons all-purpose flour

Melt the butter and chocolate together in a double boiler, stirring frequently. Remove the top of the double boiler and add the sugar, vanilla extract and salt and continue stirring. Add the eggs one at a time, stirring to incorporate each completely before adding the next. Finally, stir in the flour and beat with a wooden spoon by hand for about a minute. The filling will turn glossy and begin to come away from the bowl. Transfer to a small bowl, cover, and refrigerate until needed. NOTE: IF YOU FREEZE THIS, IT SEPARATES A TEENY BIT. SO WHAT.

Cookie Dough

2 cups flour

1/2 teaspoon baking powder

1/4 teaspoon salt

1 stick butter, softened but not squishy

1 cup sugar

1 egg

1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract

Mix the first three ingredients with a whisk and set aside. In a large bowl using an electric mixer, cream together the butter and sugar for about 3 – 4 minutes, until light and fluffy. Beat in the egg and the vanilla, and then, on low speed, beat in the flour until just incorporated. Form the dough into two bricks, warp with plastic wrap and refrigerate over night.  NOTE: FREEZES BEAUTIFULLY.

With the oven preheated to 350, remove the dough from the refrigerator and allow to warm until it becomes supple enough to roll out. Roll each brick individually to a thickness of about 1/8″. It is easiest to do this between two sheets of wax paper. You may want to turn the dough over a couple of times, keeping it between the two sheets, to ensure that no deep creases form.

Cut cookies out using a 3″ round cutter and transfer cookie rounds to a cookie sheet lined with parchment paper. Put a leveled teaspoon of filling in the center of each cookie round, then bring 3 sides of each round up to partially cover the filling. Pinch the sides together. Cookies should be spaced about 1/2″ apart on the sheet.

Bake for a total of 16-18 minutes, rotating the pans half-way through baking.  Let cool briefly on cookie sheet, and allow to cool completely on racks.

I give mine away as soon as I make them, because they are too good.

3/21/11

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At the H-SIG luncheon

Dr. Ferenc Katonah began his talk, he started off by saying.

“When you have a Hungarian friend, you don’t need an enemy.”

This is because the Hungarian government while wanting to help, continues to follow privacy laws that make everything impossible, forcing anyone to collect records to publish notices in the newspaper asking for objections to publication of the records, which takes time and money. These objections never materialize.

“When we are talking about the Hungarian matter, you are always fighting against a threat that never happens.”

Then, Katonah Feri gave us a very sad account of the misdeeds of the Hungarian gendarmerie are captured on microfilm in the records of Gendarmerie District VII, Kassa, 1944-1945 which he refers to as Z-936.

The Munkach records, the ones are on reel 2, going on to reel 4.

According to the Hungarian laws on data protection, you can use personal data only 30 years after the death of the individual, or 90 years after the date of birth, or 60 years after the creation of the records.

These are on the lists of microfilms which still need to be indexed.

Then Feri discussed records of victims of Nazi scientific experimentation that are in the National Archives of Hungary, which needs to be microfilmed and paginated.

There was one archivist paginating the records, and he died.

If you sit down at the microfilm reader, you will find out that they printed forms for the looting. and you are reading a very sad novel.

Folklander Camera is a symbol that the owner was a well to do .

During first phase of deportation, they did everything by the book. Then they did not do paperwork.

Then he talked about the name lists. From the east they have property records but no name lists. From the west they have name lists but no property records. It all depends on what was going on where.

Northern Transylvania, Record book 25, Kolosvar, Romania, Kluj.

Brandor Braham collection

In 2009, the Hungarian national archives published a book of more than 300 pages called the Hungarian Archival Records of the Beregovo district, up until 1919, and from 1939 to 1944. It is a list of materials that are not readily available.

RG 52.001M–microfilm collection prepared in late 50s early 60s.

RG 39.013N

2004 Prime minister of Hungary wanted to know where the Jaros Lists were. Gechenyi commission. Seems to stop in midair.

“I” series. ghetto lists, not deportation lists.

Hungarian Department of Losses Card are in Hungarian Archives of Military History. Microfilmed by Yad Vashem in early 1990s, and published in Nevek. Clear list of those who went missing. “Vestse deevek” Sheets of Losses Military units filed these every day. Forced laborers were on same pieces of paper as military. Those would be the most precise. Yad Vashem only copied the records with “Z” on them.

On the other side of the Iron Curtain, there was an independent commission investigating Nazi crimes, whose records, also called the Ossobyi archives, are in the Museum.

8/16/11

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More about the Erma Bombeck Writers Workshop

I learned some great things. About tweeting and DMing, rights, and writing, comedy and sadness, and Marianist Catholics.

And “Our Love is here to Stay,” is stuck in my head forever.

The Erma Bombeck Writer’s Workshop is a biannual (every 2 years) conference that occurs at the University of Dayton. U of D Catholic school run by an order of clergy and lay people called Marianists.  Matt Ewald, a professor in the communications department who is the head of the workshop, told me Marianists are like Jesuits, but not as flashy. The Communications Department puts together a weekend of communal meals, keynotes, and workshops, all of which address the different challenges of humorous and human-interest writing. There were sessions on the craft of humor, finding your voice, building your platform, selling your work, and even self-publishing.  I collected over 100 business cards, mostly from women who blog, and  got signed up to the Blog her twitter feed. As of this writing, I’ve now tweeted 158 times, and have 125 followers, including a real live comedy writer from SNL who’s coming to Palo Alto June 24 to flog the book he wrote with Dave Barry.

Erma’s whole family attends, her husband and their 3 children.  Some grandchildren attend, and I think they brought some cousins, too.  It’s a celebration and a reunion for them, and makes up a bit for the fact that Erma died quite young—she had kidney disease and died in her late 60’s. I spoke to Erma’s husband, Bill, after one of the sessions—he was right there in the back of the classroom, listening—and thanked him for creating the conference. His contribution, he told me, was insisting on holding the conference every other year, “to give the women writers enough time to recover and integrate what they’ve learned.”  Yearly conferences, he said  “just wouldn’t be enough time for the lessons to sink in and have a life, too.”

The Bombeck family is as nice as can be. They loved that their mother wrote about them; at least they seem to love it now. Before every meal, they took turns reading their favorite column. I didn’t know Erma’s father had died when she was very young—“The Daddy Doll Under the Bed’ was the first column that got read aloud, before the opening dinner, and I was welling up.  But that was nothing.  After dinner, Alan Zweibel read some of his work to us.  I was primed for tears, with all that estrogen around, but when he told us about ‘a tree called Steve,’ I was bawling.

I bonded with a few women over that, via Tweeting, of all things.

Two young moms who were staying at my hotel showed me how to actually USE my Twitter account, and I showed them that we had passed by perfectly lovely diner 3 doors down from our hotel because this diner was not on Yelp.

Maybe 5% of the attendees were men.  Some had been at the conference more than once.  One was a TV host.  The people at this conference believed the social media and concept of platform with a religious fervor. Most of the women were active or wannabe bloggers, and they had been to other social media conferences.  There was unanimous agreement that this was the warmest and most supportive atmosphere of any gathering of writers and bloggers they had been to before.

*The workshop is limited to 350 attendees, and will sell a tickets to anyone who is or wants to be a humor writer.  I didn’t have to submit an essay or be vetted at all. I heard about the conference on “She Writes,” which is one of many Web portals that compete for the eyeballs and keystrokes of aspiring writers, and by the time I heard about the workshop, all the tickets were all sold.   Hoping against hope, and not really expecting much since my father in law was very sick, I joined the Facebook group, and sent an email to someone I had never seen (where IS Ohio, anyway?)  And put myself on the waiting list in case there were cancellations.  When I got the notice on my iPhone that someone wanted to sell me her ticket, I was on the East Coast, sitting on the bus back from parent’s graves in Beth David Cemetery in Elmont, Long Island.  It was too noisy to talk, and I saw there was Wi-Fi and decided to check my email to keep from crying again, and there was the notice, that I could buy someone’s ticket.

This illustrates something that the keynoters kept saying: “Laughter and tears are always very close to one another.”

And we did plenty of both.  Alan Zweibel was hilarious, as was Adriana Trigiani, Connie Shultz, and the lady who became an author at the age of 70 when she hand drew and wrote a book called  “love, loss, and what I wore,” made 7 copies at Kinko’s to give to her children and friends, and then had a publisher call her a year later with a contract offer.

Here are my most important take-aways:

1. Carry a notebook (done)

2. If you Tweet something, it’s copyrighted, so Tweet every clever line you think of.

3. Give your loved ones veto power and first reading if you are going to write something about them.  Remind them if they veto too much, their part of your next book is going to be the shortest.

4. Have ‘the goods’ ready.  Have a finished piece ready to go when you write a query letter.

5. Don’t hit ‘send’ or post too soon.  Craft everything in Word first.

6. Read everything out loud, to someone.  Dogs are very good for this. I’ll have to make do with my cat, Cleo.

There were some great roundups of the conference written by mom bloggers who were faster to the keyboard than I am, and you can find them on the Erma Bombeck Workshop site:

 

 

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